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5 things to do after a breakup and why science says they work!

Almost all of us have been there. It started off so good, everything seemed great and you got comfortable with knowing that person was there in your life. Then, (what feels like) all of a sudden, you may be arguing, miscommunicating often, or perhaps somebody has been unfaithful or just took a path that led them away. Whatever it may be, the big issue here is that you are going through a breakup and you are hurting. Here are some tips to help you get past this difficult time.

Say YES to almost everything.

Accept all social invitations that come your way. Buy yourself some new clothes, makeup, shoes whatever it is that used to make you feel pretty. Not only is accepting all the social invites and taking part in events and gatherings going to help you feel more confident again, it is going to help you to get to know new people and realise you can be single without feeling lonely. Maybe you got lost in your partner and your relationship and forgot who you are! To begin with, following this tip will feel forced and you may not feel like you actually want to do any of this stuff. It will later feel more natural and enjoyable again.

Reconnect with old friends.

You may have got caught up in your relationship and lost touch with friends or just didn’t make as much time to see them. Be ready to perhaps apologise for that but use this new free time you have to reconnect with old friends. Make plans to see them, attend events together, go on holidays or a night away. Spend quality time with them and allow them to comfort you. Chances are they have been through a breakup too and know how debilitating it can feel. Let your friends remind you of the wonderful, independent, confident person you maybe once were!

Take care of your wellbeing and body.

There are going to be days where all you want to do is binge on junk food and make yourself feel better. Try to avoid this as it will make you feel worse in the long run however, if on the odd day you just want a Chinese takeaway and a tub of ben and jerrys, that’s ok! Be kind to yourself- it is a challenging time. But try not to develop negative habits around food. Instead try to focus on feeding your body with nutritious greens and proteins. Maybe consider joining a fitness class or yoga class to try to boost your motivation for taking care of yourself in this way. It may be that all you can manage is a face mask or a bath with bubbles and essential oils. This is great too!

Disengage from your ex.

I repeat. Disengage from your ex. You are NOT stalking them on instagram are you? Seeing what their latest story is about. Checking when they were last active on Facebook? Ok if you can relate, it is so important that you find a way to stop doing this. Block, hide or even better, delete them from all platforms. Get rid of that temptation to look at what they’re doing.

Talk to a professional breakup coach. We offer a free 20 minute telephone session to get started. Book yours here.