Category Archives: heartbroken

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what to do after a breakup

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,Uncategorised Tags : 

What to do after a breakup. . . . If you are going through a breakup, it’s normal to feel a range of emotions such as sadness, regret, anger and anxiety. You will not feel this way forever although you feel like you will. Here are some tips to help you along the process.

1) Talk to someone who can help you! Yes you should lean on your friends but sometimes you will feel like you are bringing the mood down or repeating yourself to them and they just don’t know what to do or say to help. speak to someone (like breakup-help) who won’t get tired of hearing how you feel and can give you genuine advice to help you move on.

2) allow yourself to feel sad. You may need to wallow in this for a few days- that’s ok! You are grieving a loss, the overwhelming sadness will pass but first let it exist.

3) get rid of memories or of any opportunity for you to check on them or any chance to stalk them on social media! you need to now focus on yourself. If this was going to work with them, it would have worked at the time. It is not on you to fix the entire relationship if they are not willingly reaching out to you.

4) find goals of your own and aim for those. Speak with long lost friends, reinvent yourself. Do the things you always wanted to do even if it’s just as a distraction to begin with.

5) don’t contact them especially if they were the ones to breakup with you. The ball is basically in their court and begging them probably won’t change things.

Are you going through a breakup? Book your first free 20 minute session now to get started on the journey towards being over your ex.


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breakup

How do I get over my ex?

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,Uncategorised Tags : 

How do I get over my ex? The question that brings people our way! It’s a big challenge for anybody to get over a breakup but with guidance and support it is definitely possible. If you feel like you can’t be happy without them and don’t know how to move froward with your life right now, reach out to us for a free 20 minute chat to get started! In the meantime, here are some useful tips to become aware of.

Top 5 tips:

1) Have some space from them and everything that is to do with them.

Being reminded of the ‘good times’ isn’t going to help you right now. Avoid your ex as much as you can because you will get over the breakup much sooner the less contact you allow yourself to have with them. This includes social media stalking them and checking their last seen on whatsapp!

2) say yes to all the things you are invited to do.

If your friends ask you to go with them to a jazzercise class – GO. Force yourself to be sociable with old friends and new. You need reminding that there is more to life than your ex.

3) Talk to someone about what you are going through.

If possible, speak with a professional or someone who can offer you legitimate guidance that has been proven to work. You need to be able to voice the thoughts and feelings you are experiencing without feeling like you are bringing down the mood in your friendship group or feeling like you are repeating yourself about things to your friends and family. We can help you here!

4) Allow yourself to be sad about what has happened.

If you need to cry in bed for a few hours or even a day or two, do that. Make sure you get up at some point and do functional things but allow yourself to sit with your feelings and wallow a little. This is ok. This is necessary for your healing.

5) Remind yourself of the things that made you unhappy in the relationship.

Take the rose tinted glasses off in you can because your mind is tricking you into thinking everything was your fault and they are perfect and you need to change to fix things! This is not necessarily accurate. Try not to blame yourself for what has happened. It is far more complicated than that.

Book your first free 20 minute chat with us now!


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Do you really want your ex back?

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,Uncategorised Tags : 

Breakups suck. We have well and truly established this. Especially if your one and only partner is the one to breakup with you and you don’t want it to happen. Well, you think you don’t want it to happen.

Denial– the first thing you experience. You want to fix it. Get things back to how they were. You think you can control what has happened and ‘change things’ or ‘be better’ to get them back.

This is a natural reaction, so don’t worry I’m not having a go at you! Just please ask yourself the following 5 questions before you declare with certainty that you want your ex back.

5 questions

1) Do you share the same values? The relationship really has no future if you don’t share the same values. This is not something you can just fix. Our values make us who we are and although at this stage you think you will change them if it means getting them back- this is a bad idea. You will lose yourself trying to find them again. Let us help you figure this out.

2) Are your issues resolvable? Face it- you broke up for a reason. A negative dynamic was formed along the way or you just found you weren’t right for each other. If the issues you had aren’t resolvable because you just can’t change who you or they are then it’s just not worth it.

3) Do you miss them or the idea of them? Really try to be honest about what you actually miss about them. Do you miss the person they were? How they treated you? Or do you just miss being in a relationship? Do you struggle to be alone? we can help you to understand if this is true for you.

4) Are you only remembering the good times? Are you idolising your ex? Do you keep thinking they are amazing and brilliant and it’s all your fault that it’s over? At the moment, your brain only wants to playback all of the good times and throw the rubbish times into the shadows. Be so aware of this. Look at the whole picture. We can help you with this.

5) Are you ok with the fact that they have left? This will be something you will have to be ok with if you ever got back together. At the moment you will say YES. But you will need to regain trust that they won’t abandon you at the first sign of an argument if you get back together again. They have hurt you by leaving and there is a reason they have left. Don’t lower your standards. You deserve to be with someone who actually wants to be with you without a doubt in their mind. let us help you build your confidence back up.

If you need help getting over your ex, contact us today for a free 20 minute telephone session to get started.


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breakup-help features in top relationship blogs

Breakup-help features in top relationship blogs 2021

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-help,Uncategorised

Breakup-help features in top relationship blogs 2021! We are ecstatic to share exciting news with our loyal readers. Breakup-help have featured on the top 100 best relationship blogs for 2021 with love connection! We are very happy to be featured on this wonderful list of top bloggers and had to share the news!

Breakup-help features in top relationship blogs 2021 and you can read the full article here! We have featured amongst many brilliant relationship bloggers and are on the list of top relationship blogs to read for 2021! Breakup-help has been working hard to reach as many people around the UK who are going through a breakup. This has been great in helping us with our mission! Spread the word our loyal readers, if you have a friend who needs us, send them our way!

If you are struggling after the end of a relationship, book your first free chat with breakup-help here. We can take you from feeling denial over the end of a relationship to acceptance that it is over. We work together to understand the challenging emotions that arise during the process. Feeling such as anger, hurt, abandonment and loneliness. Find out what we can do to help you.


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How to survive a breakup

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-care,self-help,stages we work through,Uncategorised Tags : 

How to survive a breakup. Its a BIG deal right. I’m sorry you’ve been hurt by a breakup. It can be so underestimated the level of hurt that a breakup can cause. But please believe me when I say- you will be okay again.

Here are my top 5 ways to help yourself during a breakup.

1. Cry it out. Don’t try to keep strong and bottle it up all the time. Take time out to sit with your feelings, allow them to be what they are and cry! The world CAN and WILL wait. Just remember at some point to pick yourself back up again.

2. When you keep remembering the good times, also remember the bad. Sounds negative but believe me- they weren’t perfect and you weren’t always happy with them. If you are struggling, ask a friend to help you think of things and write them down so you can revisit them when you are having a rose tinted glasses moment about your ex. Find out how to keep doing this here.

3. Say YES to plans and invitations to things. You need to try to remember how it feels to be independent and happy again. You are the only person you have to live with for the rest of your life- make it good! Are you struggling with the motivation to do this? Find out more on how to get started here.

4. Talk it out. This is one of the most important tips. Make sure you are finding time to talk about what has happened and how you are feeling. We can definitely help you with this one! Book your first telephone session with us here.

5. Give yourself time. You aren’t going to get over this overnight unfortunately. But be patient and kind with yourself. Ask for help and guidance to get started on feeling better.


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Results on google search for how to get better sleep.

How to get over your ex

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-care,self-help,stages we work through Tags : 

How to get over your ex. The very highly searched term in recent times. 2020 seemed to be THE year for breakups. Now we’re deep into 2021 and it’s definitely time to move forward with your life if a breakup is something you have been going through.

I figured since I help people every day to get over relationship breakups, I’d put together a helpful list of things to help you get over your ex.

Top 5 tips

1. Journaling really works. Write down all the things that are coming to mind about how you are feeling and the thoughts you are having. Putting those thoughts on paper are metaphorically taking them out of your mind for a while. It was probably starting to feel a little cluttered in there!

2. Balance out your positive thoughts of your ex with realistic ones. Come on. You know deep down they weren’t really a Prince with perfect everything. Dig deep- think about all the bad stuff too and all the things that used to drive you up the wall.

3. Think about what you have put off doing for yourself or what you have felt held back with. Did you make sacrifices and decisions based on your partner or your relationship? Time to take back your life and own your independence again! You used to be fine before them, remember?

4. Catch up with friends. Old and new. Socialise and say yes to almost everything you get invited to do. You need to be reminded that there is more to the world than your ex and this is the perfect way to be reminded of that.

5. Take time to feel what you feel. Sit with your feelings and make sure you are able to vent and talk about all of the feelings you are experiencing. Book your first free chat with us here.


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Getting over a breakup- let go and move on

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-help,Uncategorised Tags : 

Getting over a breakup-let go and move on. Relationships can have an impact on us long after they end. Something that was such a big part of your life is no longer there, how do you expect the mind to behave!!? Carrying around emotional pain from a relationship can prevent you from moving on. Here are some ways to let go and move on.

Top 5 things

1. Talk to someone. You will be going through some stages of emotions that you might not quite understand. You are essentially grieving the loss you have faced. Be sure to give yourself time and the support you need to recover from what has happened.

2. Embrace your freedom. Think about all the things you put off doing or stopped doing while you were in your relationship. Make plans for your own personal progress and focus on yourself. You will have gone from being a ‘we’ and an ‘us’ to being an ‘I’ and a ‘me’ again so this will feel like a challenge. Reach out to us for some guidance on this.

3. Stop romanticising the relationship and your ex. Chances are they weren’t as great as you are remembering them to be. Balance out those thoughts with thoughts of times when you weren’t happy or didn’t feel loved by them.

4. Sit with your feelings. Try not to bottle your emotions up. You need to sit with your feelings and allow them to be what they are. It’s no good avoiding what has happened. Face up to what you have experienced and begin to heal this way. We can help you with this.

5. Cut contact if you have no reasonable explanation for continuing communication. If you have children or shared a home, it may be necessary. But make contact the bare minimum and make communication only about those necessary things. if you keep that person close, it will prevent you from moving on because you will always keep a small piece of hope for getting back together.

If you need support after a breakup, your first telephone session is free. Book it here!


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How to get over someone: 5 expert tips

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How to get over someone: 5 expert tips to help you move on, when you feel like moving on from your ex is hopeless and is never going to happen. Moving past a breakup will be difficult, but there are ways to make it a little easier.

Top 5

1. Be patient with yourself. The most common thing I see with my clients is that they set expectations of themselves for when they should be feeling better or happy again. Give yourself a chance. Try not to apply pressure to yourself this way and work on being patient with yourself.

2. Channel your inner cheerleader. Breakups can make you forget your worth. You will be blaming yourself for things and feeling unlovable or unwanted. This is not rational thinking and you need to actively work on focusing on your best qualities.

3. Cut off contact with your ex. It is especially important to do this if communicating with them is making you feel hopeful that things will go back to normal. This is unhealthy because it means you aren’t living in the present moment and that your ex has control over your future. (This is of course not possible for some people, if you have children together for example. In this case it is important to only make communication about the child).

4. Allow yourself to feel what you are feeling. Cry if you need to. As often as you need to. Cut off people who make you feel worse even if temporary. You need to put your well-being first so if you need to be cut-throat about not communicating with people who make you feel worse, do so.

5. TALK to someone about what is happening and how you are feeling. If you have a close friend or family member maybe they will let you put them on standby if you have the urge to text or call your ex, that way you can contact your friend instead. Talk to a professional who can help work through all these tips with you. It’s easier read than done!

Hopefully you enjoyed our 5 expert tips on how to get over someone. If you are going through a breakup, book your first free chat with our breakup coach here.


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Single on Valentine’s day?

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,self-care,Uncategorised Tags : 

Are you feeling sad about being alone on valentines day? Well I’m here to tell you that you are not alone! People all around are feeling especially lonely and bored coming up to valentines day this year. Here are my top tips to survive this valentines day as a single:

1) put dating on hold. Ok at the moment this isn’t exactly much of a choice BUT tell yourself you are choosing to do this. Use the mantra ‘I am hitting pause on dating for a while’. Don’t get me wrong, you should continue to socialise with people remotely where possible but maybe consider not investing seriously in anyone during the pandemic.

2) write yourself a love letter. Really take time for yourself. Relax and get to know YOU. Write yourself a letter to celebrate all the things you are proud of and all the progress you have made.

3) Stay off social media for a day. If you know you are gonna feel salty over the #couplegoals hashtags then avoid it for one day!

4) Treat yourself. Spend whatever you would have spent on your partner, on yourself. You deserve it! Grab a takeaway and just treat yourself for a day.

5) connect with your single friends. Galentines day will also always be a thing! Have a virtual dinner date with a fellow single and share some laughter and fun. They may need it as much as you do!

Reach out to us if you are finding it hard being single on valentines day or just in general- your first telephone chat is free!


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How to get over a breakup

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How to get over a breakup, according to a relationship breakup expert.

1. Gain understanding of the processes happening inside your mind. Your brain functions differently during a breakup. You are effectively getting over an addiction because that’s what your ex became. You will become desperate and behave out of character. So, speak to someone who can explain what’s taking place in your mind.

2. Stop thinking you need ‘closure’. This is masking the desire to get back with your ex. You think by speaking to them once more you will figure outa way to fix things. Instead, work on accepting you just weren’t meant to be together. Speak to someone who can help you. Our breakup coach here offers a free 20 minute chat if you click here.

3. Unfriend them on social media. This includes any mutual friends you follow, if their posts are causing you to feel unhappy. or even if it’s just leading you to keep checking if there’s any sign of them on things. Do what you need to do to feel better. You can always reach out to people again once you get past the worst of it.

4. Recognise that your mind is reinforcing the positive moments and happy times you shared. Speak to someone and balance out those thoughts with realistic events that took place to counter balance the good ones. I can help you with this.

5. Try new things. When your friends tries to drag you out the house to go out for fresh air, GO! Force yourself to go out and do things because you need to boost your confidence back up. Try new things and go to new places with people. Break your usual routine and spend quality time with people you didn’t get round to spending time with when you were caught up in your relationship.

If you are going through a breakup, get in touch with us here today!