Category Archives: self-care

  • -

How to survive a breakup

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-care,self-help,stages we work through,Uncategorised Tags : 

How to survive a breakup. Its a BIG deal right. I’m sorry you’ve been hurt by a breakup. It can be so underestimated the level of hurt that a breakup can cause. But please believe me when I say- you will be okay again.

Here are my top 5 ways to help yourself during a breakup.

1. Cry it out. Don’t try to keep strong and bottle it up all the time. Take time out to sit with your feelings, allow them to be what they are and cry! The world CAN and WILL wait. Just remember at some point to pick yourself back up again.

2. When you keep remembering the good times, also remember the bad. Sounds negative but believe me- they weren’t perfect and you weren’t always happy with them. If you are struggling, ask a friend to help you think of things and write them down so you can revisit them when you are having a rose tinted glasses moment about your ex. Find out how to keep doing this here.

3. Say YES to plans and invitations to things. You need to try to remember how it feels to be independent and happy again. You are the only person you have to live with for the rest of your life- make it good! Are you struggling with the motivation to do this? Find out more on how to get started here.

4. Talk it out. This is one of the most important tips. Make sure you are finding time to talk about what has happened and how you are feeling. We can definitely help you with this one! Book your first telephone session with us here.

5. Give yourself time. You aren’t going to get over this overnight unfortunately. But be patient and kind with yourself. Ask for help and guidance to get started on feeling better.


  • -
Results on google search for how to get better sleep.

How to get over your ex

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-care,self-help,stages we work through Tags : 

How to get over your ex. The very highly searched term in recent times. 2020 seemed to be THE year for breakups. Now we’re deep into 2021 and it’s definitely time to move forward with your life if a breakup is something you have been going through.

I figured since I help people every day to get over relationship breakups, I’d put together a helpful list of things to help you get over your ex.

Top 5 tips

1. Journaling really works. Write down all the things that are coming to mind about how you are feeling and the thoughts you are having. Putting those thoughts on paper are metaphorically taking them out of your mind for a while. It was probably starting to feel a little cluttered in there!

2. Balance out your positive thoughts of your ex with realistic ones. Come on. You know deep down they weren’t really a Prince with perfect everything. Dig deep- think about all the bad stuff too and all the things that used to drive you up the wall.

3. Think about what you have put off doing for yourself or what you have felt held back with. Did you make sacrifices and decisions based on your partner or your relationship? Time to take back your life and own your independence again! You used to be fine before them, remember?

4. Catch up with friends. Old and new. Socialise and say yes to almost everything you get invited to do. You need to be reminded that there is more to the world than your ex and this is the perfect way to be reminded of that.

5. Take time to feel what you feel. Sit with your feelings and make sure you are able to vent and talk about all of the feelings you are experiencing. Book your first free chat with us here.


  • -

Single on Valentine’s day?

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,self-care,Uncategorised Tags : 

Are you feeling sad about being alone on valentines day? Well I’m here to tell you that you are not alone! People all around are feeling especially lonely and bored coming up to valentines day this year. Here are my top tips to survive this valentines day as a single:

1) put dating on hold. Ok at the moment this isn’t exactly much of a choice BUT tell yourself you are choosing to do this. Use the mantra ‘I am hitting pause on dating for a while’. Don’t get me wrong, you should continue to socialise with people remotely where possible but maybe consider not investing seriously in anyone during the pandemic.

2) write yourself a love letter. Really take time for yourself. Relax and get to know YOU. Write yourself a letter to celebrate all the things you are proud of and all the progress you have made.

3) Stay off social media for a day. If you know you are gonna feel salty over the #couplegoals hashtags then avoid it for one day!

4) Treat yourself. Spend whatever you would have spent on your partner, on yourself. You deserve it! Grab a takeaway and just treat yourself for a day.

5) connect with your single friends. Galentines day will also always be a thing! Have a virtual dinner date with a fellow single and share some laughter and fun. They may need it as much as you do!

Reach out to us if you are finding it hard being single on valentines day or just in general- your first telephone chat is free!


  • -
my alone feels so good

How to: be happy on your own

Category:relationship,self-care,self-help,Uncategorised Tags : 

How to be happy on your own and in your own company. 5 tips to train your mind to be better at this. Following on from my previous blog post (do you want to stop feeling lonely after a breakup), here is an article to help you master being on your own and enjoying it!

Some people are naturally happy being solo but for others it can be a real challenge. However, there are always ways to become more comfortable with this (even if you are a dedicated extrovert!).

Having a positive relationship with yourself is definitely an investment worth having. You spend a lot of time with yourself, so you may as well learn to enjoy it!

First let’s separate being ‘alone’ from being ‘lonely’. They may overlap, however they are very different. If you feel content when you are having alone time and look forward to it, this is simply being alone. If when you are on your own, you are filled with sadness and ache for company then you, my friend, feel lonely.

Why is being ‘alone’ seen as such a negative thing?! Ultimately all it means is that you are on your own but this could be such a productive and self-reflective time that leads to all positive things!

Ok lets dive into my top 5 tips to get more comfortable being alone.

Top 5 tips:

1) STOP comparing yourself to others.

Let’s face it, those people who appear to be doing lots of brilliant things, who look like they have an enviable social life are probably just very good at keeping up appearances. Get out of the negative habit of looking at other people’s lives and comparing yours with theirs.

2) BREAK free from social media.

Even if it’s only during the time you are alone or for an hour each evening. If you notice that scrolling through your news feeds are making you feel stressed or feel a strong case of FOMO then this is a huge indicator that you need to wean yourself off the gram!

3) TAKE YOURSELF out for a date.

If even just the thought of going out on your own fills you with anxiety it means you have room to improve your relationship with yourself. Are you are reading this tip and thinking, ‘there’s no way I’m going out for lunch on my own’? Start by going to a coffee shop once a week instead. This will feel more acceptable to you until you have mastered the art of being happy alone.

4) DO NOTHING for 5-10 minutes of your day.

Sounds ridiculous I know. Who tells anyone to ‘do nothing’ but by this I mean literally nothing. Stare out the window, sit in a dimly lit room, let your mind truly wander without any distractions. You need this time to think of brilliant ideas and it doesn’t happen when you are constantly distracted by something.

5) EMBRACE NATURE and go for a mindful walk.

If you have a dog that you have to walk anyway this will be easy to get into the habit of doing, but if not then take a walk around the block to start off and gradually build this up. It’s not just about walking, it’s about taking in your surroundings as you go. Use your senses- what can you smell, see and touch. Try to really be in the moment. This gets easier with practice.

If you are struggling to be on your own after a breakup, book a free 20 minute chat with me here.


  • -
lonely after breakup

Stop feeling lonely after a breakup

Category:heartbroken,self-care,self-help,Uncategorised Tags : 

Stop feeling lonely after a breakup. Are you experiencing a crippling sense of loneliness since you became newly single? You are not alone in feeling alone!

Lots of women are opening up lately about feelings of loneliness. Opening up about feeling this way shows vulnerability and allows others to express their own feelings on the matter. Speaking about it is the first step to stop feeling lonely after a breakup.

These moments of feeling lonely and low will ultimately make you stronger. It will cause you to feel so uncomfortable that the only thing to do is grow from it.

Allow the loneliness you feel to force you out of your comfort zone to meet new people and try new things.

Here are some ideas;

1- get in touch with an old friend who you haven’t spoken to for a really long time.

2- find your passion … the things that sparks fire in your stomach

3- pick a new hobby and dive straight into it

4- make plans. Plan as many things as you can!

5- join a class. Get a friend to go with you if you are nervous.

6- remove toxic people from your life to make room for the good ones!

7- learn to be happy spending time on your own. (I will be posting an article on ways to train yourself to do this next week!)

8- feel lonely and accept it for what it is. That is: a feeling. Allow it to be just that and sit with it for a few minutes or as long as you need. Allow yourself to feel low but then pick yourself back up at some point soon and do something 1-7 off of this list!!!

When you can’t enjoy spending time on your own without feeling lonely it will cause you to stay in bad relationships with people who you lack positive connections with. This is because it gives you a temporary fix of comfort but is not good for you in the long run.

If YOU don’t enjoy spending time with YOU, then how can you expect someone else to want to? But also be prepared to be happy and comfortable on your own and allow positive relationships with people to enhance your life only. Know you will be fine with or without others, because you’ve already built a strong foundation of self love.

If you are feeling lonely after a breakup and need some help, book your free 20 minute chat with me here.


  • -
mindful living photo

Mindful living and how to practice this daily

Category:self-care,Uncategorised Tags : 

Mindful living is all to do with focusing on the current moment whatever you happen to be doing at the time. Ultimately it is about focusing on the ‘now’ and the living in the present time.

Sometimes we can get so caught up in focusing on our goals and thinking about our future plans or even in looking back at mistakes made or our regrets that we may have. So I’ve put together some quick tips to help you practice mindful living in your daily life:

1) meditation- focus on your breathing. breathe in and then connect with this feeling. Then pause and breathe out. Try not to focus on any thoughts that may pop into you head and focus back on your breathing.

2) use your senses more. Practice mindful eating- be more aware of the taste of food and try not to eat on autopilot. When you next shower- notice the smell of the shower gel or soap. Next time it rains- focus on the sound of it pattering on the window. Focus on these things more!

3) start your day with an affirmation. Think of a relevant positive sentence that you will say to yourself when you wake up in the morning.

4) look inward. The relationship you have with yourself is the most important. Be mindful of who you are and of your thoughts, feelings and behaviours. Be kind to yourself and work on growing to be the best version of yourself.

5) make your home feel balanced and safe. Keep things clean, tidy and organised to make it relaxing and comfortable. This will in turn help to clear your mind of clutter and help you feel more balanced.

Book your free 20 minute telephone session with our specialist relationship breakup coach here and find peace after a breakup.


  • 2

Self-care and self-love

Category:heartbroken,self-care,self-help,Uncategorised Tags : 

Self-care and self-love is so important because ladies we have to love and care for ourselves! Evolution says that women have an innate need to care for others. This is true, however, I’ve come to realise that in order to do this effectively, we must first be feeling whole in ourselves.

Too often, we as women get so caught up helping everyone around us, taking care of other people, thinking and over-thinking about what other people are feeling/doing/needing/thinking – it’s exhausting just writing about it!

I’ve written a list (don’t we all just love a list) of all the things I personally do to make myself feel loved and cared for by myself and wanted to share this with you.

Spoil yourself- you deserve it! Enjoy my self-care and self-love tips.

1) Self-care and self-love rule number one

bubble baths never get old. Always seems like a faff, right, when you can just get a shower and get on with all the other jobs and things that need getting done…….okay pause— take the time to do this one once in a while because the calming effects are priceless. Lots of bubbles, wine (or a cuppa) a programme or movie (if you have a waterproof cover on your tablet) whilst chilling in the bath will do your mind wonders!

2) Pamper time….

okay I know we are all super busy all the time with a million things to do but this can take as little as 20-30 minutes depending on how OTT or not you go. Put on a face mask, paint those nails, sort those blocked pores on your nose out tweeze away those stray hairs around the ugly sister brow and make yourself feel beautiful. Confidence looks good on you and this pamper time will make you feel super pretty. It’s worth it ladies!!!!

3) Have a friend over for a feel-good girlie movie afternoon/evening.

This is so important… we need to have time with our girlfriends! Put pjs on if you like, pig out if you must, get the popcorn out and have a super girlie movie night. (Even if you do end up missing half the film because you are too busy sharing secrets, laughter and chatting too much…..) this is what it’s all about!

4) Ok this may be my favourite. Get outside!!!

It is so important to get that vitamin D so make sure if you see even a hint of sunshine get outside and get that goodness into your body.

5) You might hate me for bringing this one up but…

exercise is so good for the mind. Honestly you don’t have to cycle or go for a run everyday but find something to do that you enjoy and gets you moving. Dance, buy a hula-hoop, practice yoga, do whatever takes your fancy but this is so so good for us!

6) Eat well!

Okay we all love a treat now and again but theres no getting away from the goodness in certain foods and the fact that naughty food can make us later feel hideous and sluggish. Try to get those veggies in and drink enough of water. We are after all just like a house plant although a little more complicated………

7) Laugh and smile…

whenever you can. Life is wonderful even when we forget that it is. We have all heard that laughter is the best cure. But there is some science behind this! If you smile even when unhappy, you can trick your mind into thinking you are happy and this makes you feel better! Try it now…… smile… you know you want to!

That’s all for today ladies- try at least one of these self-care and self-love tips weekly to start off with. Thank me later!!!

Self-care and self-love comes easier when you have somebody to guide you and rebuild your confidence together with you. If you need one on one personal support to get over a breakup, I offer a free 20 minute chat to get started- book yours here today!