Top 5 necessary steps to get over someone after a breakup. Saying goodbye is a difficult but necessary part of life however, knowing this doesn’t make it any easier. It can take some time and guidance to rebuild your life and heal from a breakup. When you think you are going to share your life with someone and suddenly that person is no longer around, it can feel heart breaking and devastating to say the least. You may be feeling like nothing will help and like you will never be happy again, but this is not accurate. Here are some steps to start your healing process.
- Go no-contact. This feels impossible at times but know that the more you stay connected with your ex even if its just a message here or an Instagram stalk there, you are holding yourself back from healing. Remove them from all platforms or at least hide their activity initially if this is too difficult. Only interact with them for necessary reasons.
- Find yourself again. Right now you only identify as an ‘us’ and a ‘we’ and you may be frightened of a life without your ex. It is the time to rediscover who you are and rebuild your self-confidence. You were once confident and happy without your ex. Remember that person, their likes and hobbies. The things that made you feel alive and worthy of happiness.
- Allow yourself to feel your feelings. This is a challenging time for you so try to be kind to yourself whilst you figure things out. If you feel sad, sit with that because only when you allow it to exist will it eventually be able to pass. You are not your feelings! They are separate from you, but acknowledge them and allow them to be.
- But say yes to activities and social events with friends. Don’t wallow for too long, make sure you get up and do something intermittently. Even if at first it’s just to attend to personal hygiene. Try to maintain some normality to your life.
- Talk it out. Seek help from a professional- talking to friends and family is helpful but not enough. We offer a free telephone session to get you started on the journey to healing after a breakup.