Stop taking things personally something that is easier said than done, right? It’s also something a lot of us have been told by someone at some point in our lives and if you are being honest, did you take it personally when this happened?
Okay so it’s important for your own wellbeing that you try your best to remain in your energy. Try not take things personally in life, because it can lead you to feel uncomfortable or unhappy.
My job is to make you feel happy and confident, so, I’m writing this post to offer my best tips to not taking things personally.
Top 5 tips:
1) accept that your beliefs are not the same as someone else’s. Your personal beliefs are what shape your interpretation of events that take place. You may believe it’s rude if a person doesn’t respond to your ‘good morning’ greeting in the lift.
Your belief leads you to:
perceive this as them being rude. Stepping away from your beliefs for a moment can help you to think more logically- maybe they don’t speak English. Maybe they didn’t hear you or maybe they have just had a bad experience with strangers in lifts! Try to think outside of your own ‘beliefs’ box.
2) work on worrying less about what people think of you. This takes time and sometimes my clients need guidance to master this. Once you do, it’s much easier to stop taking things personally. From the day we are born, we are conditioned to think we have to be accepted by others. The truth is – not everyone has to like you. You could be the juiciest peach in the fruit bowl and there will be someone out there who just doesn’t like peaches. Accept yourself, that way it’s easier not to take things personally in life.
3) maintain power over how you are feeling. By taking something someone else has said personally, you are effectively allowing them to be in control of how you are feeling.
Try to choose a different line of thought:
you can’t control what someone else says or does, however, you can control your response to it. Just think- if someone served you up some rotten fruit, would you eat it and allow it to have a negative effect on you? Or would you throw it away?! The same goes for comments that are sent your way. Will you listen to it and allow it to affect you negatively or will you ‘throw it away?’ Make a choice!
4) Be aware of the ‘spotlight effect’. We’ve all been there- someone says something. They are looking over at us. We take it personally and it feels like we are being judged or criticised. In actual fact, they probably haven’t even noticed you! The reality is, that look they gave you was nothing. That conversation they were having was not even about you! The spotlight effect is where we are so inside our own head, thus we are acutely aware of our own flaws and weaknesses. We feel that others may notice them too and more often than not, they don’t!
5) let go of the idea of social perfectionism. Not one person on the planet is perfect. We all make or have made mistakes.
When you believe that you have to be perfect, this can lead to:
a constant worry about how you come across to others. It’s ok to worry about what others think of you a little- being social creatures, we all do it! Try to practice letting go of things you don’t do perfectly and have some empathy for yourself. We are always harder on ourselves for things than we are on other people. You are likely judging yourself more than any one else is judging you!! Be kind to yourself too.
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