Tag Archives: breakup

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How do I get over my ex?

Category:breakup help,relationship,self-help Tags : 

How do I get over my ex? The question I get asked a number of times on a daily basis. It takes a bit of work and a bit of guidance and support but here are some tips to get you started.

1) cry it out. If you feel like you want to cry, do it! Sitting with your feelings and letting them be what they are is a massive part of the healing process.

2) talk it out. You need to talk about the thoughts and feelings you are having. Yes, your friends may be sick of hearing the same things over and over again- speak to breakup-help! Telephone sessions with us can help you get to a much better place after the breakup!

3) say yes. To almost everything you get asked to do or invited to. You need reminding that you can do things without your ex. It will be difficult to find the strength to say yes but once you do it will be incredibly helpful.

4) remember who you are. Rebuild your relationship with yourself. What did you enjoy doing that you stopped doing during your relationship? What plans and goals did you have for yourself?

5) be patient with yourself. It won’t happen overnight! However if you do all the things necessary as mentioned above and as guided by us, you will be well on your way to acceptance and happiness without your ex.

Book your first free telephone session here!


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breakup

Get over your ex

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,Uncategorised Tags : 

Get over your ex and move on for good. Are you wondering how to move on from your ex after a breakup and don’t know how to? Here are some tips to help you.

1) cry it out. There are going to be days you don’t want to get out of bed in the morning or eat 3 meals like you usually do. It’s ok to wallow in your grief a little. Cry if you need to. Remember this is temporary and you won’t always feel this way.

2) say YES to things. If your friends and family are inviting you to do things with them, say yes. You need to remember that you had a life before your ex! There are things you will find joy in without them, you just need to make yourself try.

3) balance out your thoughts. You will be remembering all the good times and maybe blaming yourself for the breakup. There are things you didn’t like about your ex and there are things that made you feel unhappy. Remember those things! Write them down. Balance out your thoughts.

4) rebuild your relationship with yourself. What were your life goals before your ex? What do you enjoy doing? Get out there and find yourself again.

5) talk it out. You need to be able to talk about all the thoughts and feelings you’ve had during this breakup. Speak to someone who can guide you back to happiness. Book your first free telephone session with breakup-help today!


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what to do after a breakup

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,Uncategorised Tags : 

What to do after a breakup. . . . If you are going through a breakup, it’s normal to feel a range of emotions such as sadness, regret, anger and anxiety. You will not feel this way forever although you feel like you will. Here are some tips to help you along the process.

1) Talk to someone who can help you! Yes you should lean on your friends but sometimes you will feel like you are bringing the mood down or repeating yourself to them and they just don’t know what to do or say to help. speak to someone (like breakup-help) who won’t get tired of hearing how you feel and can give you genuine advice to help you move on.

2) allow yourself to feel sad. You may need to wallow in this for a few days- that’s ok! You are grieving a loss, the overwhelming sadness will pass but first let it exist.

3) get rid of memories or of any opportunity for you to check on them or any chance to stalk them on social media! you need to now focus on yourself. If this was going to work with them, it would have worked at the time. It is not on you to fix the entire relationship if they are not willingly reaching out to you.

4) find goals of your own and aim for those. Speak with long lost friends, reinvent yourself. Do the things you always wanted to do even if it’s just as a distraction to begin with.

5) don’t contact them especially if they were the ones to breakup with you. The ball is basically in their court and begging them probably won’t change things.

Are you going through a breakup? Book your first free 20 minute session now to get started on the journey towards being over your ex.


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breakup-help has won an award!

Breakup-help has won an award!

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Breakup-help has won an award! It’s our pleasure to announce that breakup-help has been named ‘the most unique telephone support service for 2021’! This is such an achievement for breakup-help, we strive to offer support to people all over the country after they have gone through a relationship breakup.

Relationships breakups can be such a low, sad and lonely time. Breakup-help knows this and wants to help people come out the other side of a breakup. We strive to continue to provide support to those who need it and are very happy with the recognition that SME News have provided us with.

Breakup-help has won an award- SME News has awarded breakup-help the title of ‘most unique telephone advice and support service 2021’ for the 2021 UK enterprise awards. See more about SME News here. SME news recognised and placed value on our service.

Are you going through a breakup? Book your free chat with us here and see what it is all about. We can guide you through the process from denial over the end of a breakup through to acceptance. Are you are just going through a breakup? Do you feel like nothing will make you feel better? Then reach out to us for help.


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How to survive a breakup

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-care,self-help,stages we work through,Uncategorised Tags : 

How to survive a breakup. Its a BIG deal right. I’m sorry you’ve been hurt by a breakup. It can be so underestimated the level of hurt that a breakup can cause. But please believe me when I say- you will be okay again.

Here are my top 5 ways to help yourself during a breakup.

1. Cry it out. Don’t try to keep strong and bottle it up all the time. Take time out to sit with your feelings, allow them to be what they are and cry! The world CAN and WILL wait. Just remember at some point to pick yourself back up again.

2. When you keep remembering the good times, also remember the bad. Sounds negative but believe me- they weren’t perfect and you weren’t always happy with them. If you are struggling, ask a friend to help you think of things and write them down so you can revisit them when you are having a rose tinted glasses moment about your ex. Find out how to keep doing this here.

3. Say YES to plans and invitations to things. You need to try to remember how it feels to be independent and happy again. You are the only person you have to live with for the rest of your life- make it good! Are you struggling with the motivation to do this? Find out more on how to get started here.

4. Talk it out. This is one of the most important tips. Make sure you are finding time to talk about what has happened and how you are feeling. We can definitely help you with this one! Book your first telephone session with us here.

5. Give yourself time. You aren’t going to get over this overnight unfortunately. But be patient and kind with yourself. Ask for help and guidance to get started on feeling better.


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Results on google search for how to get better sleep.

How to get over your ex

Category:breakup help,heartbroken,relationship,self-care,self-help,stages we work through Tags : 

How to get over your ex. The very highly searched term in recent times. 2020 seemed to be THE year for breakups. Now we’re deep into 2021 and it’s definitely time to move forward with your life if a breakup is something you have been going through.

I figured since I help people every day to get over relationship breakups, I’d put together a helpful list of things to help you get over your ex.

Top 5 tips

1. Journaling really works. Write down all the things that are coming to mind about how you are feeling and the thoughts you are having. Putting those thoughts on paper are metaphorically taking them out of your mind for a while. It was probably starting to feel a little cluttered in there!

2. Balance out your positive thoughts of your ex with realistic ones. Come on. You know deep down they weren’t really a Prince with perfect everything. Dig deep- think about all the bad stuff too and all the things that used to drive you up the wall.

3. Think about what you have put off doing for yourself or what you have felt held back with. Did you make sacrifices and decisions based on your partner or your relationship? Time to take back your life and own your independence again! You used to be fine before them, remember?

4. Catch up with friends. Old and new. Socialise and say yes to almost everything you get invited to do. You need to be reminded that there is more to the world than your ex and this is the perfect way to be reminded of that.

5. Take time to feel what you feel. Sit with your feelings and make sure you are able to vent and talk about all of the feelings you are experiencing. Book your first free chat with us here.


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How to get over a breakup

Category:breakup help,heartbroken Tags : 

How to get over a breakup, according to a relationship breakup expert.

1. Gain understanding of the processes happening inside your mind. Your brain functions differently during a breakup. You are effectively getting over an addiction because that’s what your ex became. You will become desperate and behave out of character. So, speak to someone who can explain what’s taking place in your mind.

2. Stop thinking you need ‘closure’. This is masking the desire to get back with your ex. You think by speaking to them once more you will figure outa way to fix things. Instead, work on accepting you just weren’t meant to be together. Speak to someone who can help you. Our breakup coach here offers a free 20 minute chat if you click here.

3. Unfriend them on social media. This includes any mutual friends you follow, if their posts are causing you to feel unhappy. or even if it’s just leading you to keep checking if there’s any sign of them on things. Do what you need to do to feel better. You can always reach out to people again once you get past the worst of it.

4. Recognise that your mind is reinforcing the positive moments and happy times you shared. Speak to someone and balance out those thoughts with realistic events that took place to counter balance the good ones. I can help you with this.

5. Try new things. When your friends tries to drag you out the house to go out for fresh air, GO! Force yourself to go out and do things because you need to boost your confidence back up. Try new things and go to new places with people. Break your usual routine and spend quality time with people you didn’t get round to spending time with when you were caught up in your relationship.

If you are going through a breakup, get in touch with us here today!


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my alone feels so good

How to: be happy on your own

Category:relationship,self-care,self-help,Uncategorised Tags : 

How to be happy on your own and in your own company. 5 tips to train your mind to be better at this. Following on from my previous blog post (do you want to stop feeling lonely after a breakup), here is an article to help you master being on your own and enjoying it!

Some people are naturally happy being solo but for others it can be a real challenge. However, there are always ways to become more comfortable with this (even if you are a dedicated extrovert!).

Having a positive relationship with yourself is definitely an investment worth having. You spend a lot of time with yourself, so you may as well learn to enjoy it!

First let’s separate being ‘alone’ from being ‘lonely’. They may overlap, however they are very different. If you feel content when you are having alone time and look forward to it, this is simply being alone. If when you are on your own, you are filled with sadness and ache for company then you, my friend, feel lonely.

Why is being ‘alone’ seen as such a negative thing?! Ultimately all it means is that you are on your own but this could be such a productive and self-reflective time that leads to all positive things!

Ok lets dive into my top 5 tips to get more comfortable being alone.

Top 5 tips:

1) STOP comparing yourself to others.

Let’s face it, those people who appear to be doing lots of brilliant things, who look like they have an enviable social life are probably just very good at keeping up appearances. Get out of the negative habit of looking at other people’s lives and comparing yours with theirs.

2) BREAK free from social media.

Even if it’s only during the time you are alone or for an hour each evening. If you notice that scrolling through your news feeds are making you feel stressed or feel a strong case of FOMO then this is a huge indicator that you need to wean yourself off the gram!

3) TAKE YOURSELF out for a date.

If even just the thought of going out on your own fills you with anxiety it means you have room to improve your relationship with yourself. Are you are reading this tip and thinking, ‘there’s no way I’m going out for lunch on my own’? Start by going to a coffee shop once a week instead. This will feel more acceptable to you until you have mastered the art of being happy alone.

4) DO NOTHING for 5-10 minutes of your day.

Sounds ridiculous I know. Who tells anyone to ‘do nothing’ but by this I mean literally nothing. Stare out the window, sit in a dimly lit room, let your mind truly wander without any distractions. You need this time to think of brilliant ideas and it doesn’t happen when you are constantly distracted by something.

5) EMBRACE NATURE and go for a mindful walk.

If you have a dog that you have to walk anyway this will be easy to get into the habit of doing, but if not then take a walk around the block to start off and gradually build this up. It’s not just about walking, it’s about taking in your surroundings as you go. Use your senses- what can you smell, see and touch. Try to really be in the moment. This gets easier with practice.

If you are struggling to be on your own after a breakup, book a free 20 minute chat with me here.


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lonely after breakup

Stop feeling lonely after a breakup

Category:heartbroken,self-care,self-help,Uncategorised Tags : 

Stop feeling lonely after a breakup. Are you experiencing a crippling sense of loneliness since you became newly single? You are not alone in feeling alone!

Lots of women are opening up lately about feelings of loneliness. Opening up about feeling this way shows vulnerability and allows others to express their own feelings on the matter. Speaking about it is the first step to stop feeling lonely after a breakup.

These moments of feeling lonely and low will ultimately make you stronger. It will cause you to feel so uncomfortable that the only thing to do is grow from it.

Allow the loneliness you feel to force you out of your comfort zone to meet new people and try new things.

Here are some ideas;

1- get in touch with an old friend who you haven’t spoken to for a really long time.

2- find your passion … the things that sparks fire in your stomach

3- pick a new hobby and dive straight into it

4- make plans. Plan as many things as you can!

5- join a class. Get a friend to go with you if you are nervous.

6- remove toxic people from your life to make room for the good ones!

7- learn to be happy spending time on your own. (I will be posting an article on ways to train yourself to do this next week!)

8- feel lonely and accept it for what it is. That is: a feeling. Allow it to be just that and sit with it for a few minutes or as long as you need. Allow yourself to feel low but then pick yourself back up at some point soon and do something 1-7 off of this list!!!

When you can’t enjoy spending time on your own without feeling lonely it will cause you to stay in bad relationships with people who you lack positive connections with. This is because it gives you a temporary fix of comfort but is not good for you in the long run.

If YOU don’t enjoy spending time with YOU, then how can you expect someone else to want to? But also be prepared to be happy and comfortable on your own and allow positive relationships with people to enhance your life only. Know you will be fine with or without others, because you’ve already built a strong foundation of self love.

If you are feeling lonely after a breakup and need some help, book your free 20 minute chat with me here.


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How to deal with a breakup in quarantine

Category:heartbroken,relationship,Uncategorised Tags : 

How to deal with a breakup in quarantine. Breakups are hard in normal conditions and during a pandemic will be even more of a challenge. Here are 5 tips to help you if this is happening to you.

1) Communicate with people.

Activities that are usually available to us as a distraction aren’t as readily available anymore so meeting with friends or going out as we would have before may not be possible. Communicate with and reach out to family and friends wherever possible- ask for help.

2) Allow yourself to be sad.

Don’t think just because the pandemic is happening and everyone is having issues and problems surrounding it that you can’t feel sad and express that. Be kind to yourself as you would be to a friend.

3) Take up a new hobby.

One positive thing the pandemic has probably given us is more time. Time to do something new that makes you feel good. Replace the time you spent with your ex with something new for yourself.

4) Social distance yourself from your ex!

Block them on everything and get rid of everything that is a trigger for you hurting. This can be a challenge if you are still living together but make it your priority to be away from them and focus on yourself.

5) Engage in distractions.

If you can’t meet friends in person, have a long telephone conversation or dinner over zoom! Treat yourself to some new make up or clothes and meet new people (this is still possible in a virtual way!), join an online fitness class or just focus on something for your own health and wellness.

Those are my top 5 tips for how to deal with a breakup in quarantine. If you need help getting over your ex, book a free 20 minute chat with me here.